My psychic connection with Tom Cruise

This is getting really weird. If I find some actress hot, Tom will eventually get there. He is slow. It takes him a while, but he always finds his way. We can leave Nicole out of this discussion as Tom started to date her before puberty hit me. But ever since I discovered Penelope in Amenábar's fantastic Abre los ojos, I had a huge crush on her. Just for her I endured Captain Corelli's Mandolin, Blowout and Woman on Top. What happens next? Cameron Crowe has to make a stupid remake of that great film and has to cast Tom who of course pounces on the golden opportunity. I can't even hate Cameron for that. Almost Famous is close to my heart.

Time passes, life moves on, Penelope's natural innocent beauty disappears in search of the perfect Hollywood look and I stumble across Wonder Boys on a rainy Redmond afternoon after getting tired of adding bugs to Windows 2000 storage manager. It was a great little film, but more to the point Katie Holmes was hot. Obviously I had to start stalking her religiously and endure some real atrocities like Abandon, The Gift and Phone Booth. The Gift, however, totally redeems itself in a couple of seconds near the end of the film. Now 5 years and a few thousand Windows patches after, Tom seems to have found Katie. Don't be surprised if Tom starts dating Preity Zinta in 2010 and Ludivine Sagnier in 2015.